1. “What times are these that a man cannot, in total confidence, proclaim his love for Sora Takenouchi from the sumptuous Digimon? The plebians in this world may never recognize what constitutes the perfect woman, and for them, my pity is unending.”
2. “For I have seen the gates of heaven themselves, golden and proud. And what prompted such a vision? Episode 1034 of Naruto – “Formation! New Team Kakashi!” of course. Will man ever again attain such heights of artistic merit?”
3. “Truly, the knaves who have vandalized my Wikipedia entry for InuYasha know not the power they have unleashed! For I shall rain destruction upon these peasants, much as Ichigo Kurosaki from Bleach rains destruction on those who would prey on the weak!”
4. “Watch a ruinous English dub of Sazae-San? Surely you jest! Fie upon you and your corruption of the noble language of Nippon!”
5. “Anime_Krazy67, you have made a grave error this day. For while I live, no man shall impugn the dignity and majesty of Yu-Gi-Oh: Duel Monsters GX. How dare you, sir, how dare you? Anime_Krazy67: A brazen fool who would do better to return to his episodes of Horochan: Zombie Slayer D or some other dreck!”
6. “Warner Brothers, FEH!”
7. “And verily, upon learning that it was dubbed, I did heave that Dragonball Z DVD box set to the floor with tremendous force. Thus I was banned from HMV.”
8. “… and she did look upon me with disdain, but I knew I had won the day. For she would presently be returning only to the arms of some Neanderthal, whilst I would be shaking in ecstasy while watching the Neon Genesis: Evangelion finale once again.”
9. “A visit from compatriot Ronnie Crawford did lead to much revelry, and much consumption of tangerine Fanta! We commenced the evening with a scholarly debate over who could best whom in combat, InuYasha or Gohan, and proceeded to screen a rare, banned-from-TV episode of Ranma ½. Then we went to Sizzler’s.”
10. “A pox on Mr. Feldmann, 10th grade chemistry instructor! Who requires the knowledge of atoms, when Full Metal Alchemist teaches all one would ever wish to know about science?”
11. “Pixar, FEH!”
12. “Oh, frabjoyous day! A new addition brightens Mrs. Crutchfield’s English class, and, joy of joys, he is of noble Nipponese descent! Verily and with great confidence I did approach the gentleman, and greeted him with perfect honorific usage. I demanded to know which anime did he find the most original and true to life in Nippon, but was foiled when Mrs. Crutchfield did force me to return to my seat.”
13. “Terrible news! In her ‘wisdom’, the matriarch of the Donahue household decided to dispose of my treasured Urusei-Yatsura sleepwear! This injustice will not stand! I did wring an apology from her crude lips, but was then sent to Sobey’s to purchase milk.”
14. “FEH!”
